The Apostle Paul is widely considered the greatest of the apostles. He wrote a vast portion of the New Testament. You would expect his self-confidence to rise as his ministry expanded.

But if you look at his letters in chronological order, you see a different trajectory.

Early in his ministry, writing to the Corinthians, he compares himself to the other leaders: “For I am the least of the apostles...” 1 Corinthians 15:9

Years later, writing to the Ephesians, his comparison group widens: “To me, who am less than the least of all the saints...” Ephesians 3:8

He no longer sees himself as just the last among leaders, but the last among all believers.

Finally, near the end of his life, writing to Timothy, he stops comparing himself to believers entirely: “Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief.” 1 Timothy 1:15

In the Greek, the verb for "am" is (eimi) εἰμί — present tense. Not "I was." I am.

Paul wasn't getting worse. He was seeing clearer. The closer he got to the light of God, the more clearly he saw the dust in his own room.

But he didn't stop at the dust. He didn't end in despair. This awareness served only to magnify the grace of God.
The bigger the debt, the more beautiful the payment.

The more you see your need, the more you will treasure His supply.